I don’t seem like an emotional person, but my emotions often reflect through my writings. My sister’s friend told me that after she read my blog. And I can’t help but agree with that.
But the only time when I get emotional is when I revisit those unforgettable memories of my old friends and my old school. I never even thought that one day I would have to leave it all,just like that. And it all happened so suddenly that I didn’t even have enough time to realise what was happening. I didn’t realise how much it was gonna hurt me later, how many times my eyes would well up with tears even at the mere thought of those times. It’s true that the bonds you make in childhood are the strongest ones.
I had been in that school for seven years,with the same people. It was a second home for me. Oh, what wonderful times they were! My whole class was a pact,always together. And I had the craziest friends(you know who you are). We used to have the most stupid fights, and the most weird reunions! For the record, I remember everything, every moment we shared, every time we laughed. It was like the moments had seized us. We were moving so fast in our lives,it was hard to stop and look at the past. I still remember that each period, we used to exchange chits and talk endlessly. At that time, we never knew that we all would split up. We were just living in the moment.
And then, this day came when I sadly declared that I am changing my school. It came as a shock to everyone. They started pestering me with questions. ”Really? Is this for real?”, ”So,you are just leaving us?”, ”Why? It makes no sense. We are all here,why would you want to go?”,etc.
After a few days, that unfortunate day came, my last day. That day,we enjoyed and laughed and talked so much. I still remember that I was sitting with this guy who told me this really stupid joke to make me laugh. I was drinking water at that time and then, all of a sudden, all the water came out of my mouth and splashed on the floor. Thank god it wasn’t him! It was some joke about a couple of donkeys and a police officer..I can’t remember exactly. And I wouldn’t just stop laughing! I laughed and laughed until my stomach started to ache. I laughed on that dumb joke for about one whole period. Whenever I tried to control my laughter, he would repeat it and I would go all nuts again. This went for about half of the day. I don’t know what had happened to me. Although my classmates did often tell me that I was drunk! My friends,after crossing their tolerance level, finally grabbed me and pushed me to go to the medical room. They kept saying,”you really need some kind of medicine.” I kept protesting and screaming in the corridor,”No,really,I am fine,guys. Trust me. Didn’t you listen to his joke? It is funny.” And I would then burst into fits of laughter. Even after much giggled protests of mine, they opened the medical room’s door and pushed me in. Even then I couldn’t stop laughing. The doctor looked at us,confused why were we all there, and we,unable to speak anything ,did something really stupid. We all ran out of the room and kept running as if we were worried that she would come after us and kill us! Well, that was us. After our impromptu ‘escape from the monstrous doctor’, I stared at my friends and said,”Are you all mad? Don’t tell me that you really thought I was sick or something?”. They replied,”Of course not! We just wanted to have some fun with you.”. I gave them dead glares and said,” Well,at least I have stopped laughing now.” Then we all had a moment. I smiled at them and said,”I am gonna miss you.” They replied in chorus,”Me too.”
You are probably wondering how do I still remember all this, even after five years…But that was my last day, and quite probably the best, I will always cherish it. Anyway,that day finally came to an end. But luckily, it was also the birthday of one of my friends, so that meant we were going to meet later in the evening again. We had loads of fun at the party, but all the time I kept thinking that what will happen to me now. Would I change for the better or for the worst, would I be able to settle in my new school or not…
That party too ended on a happy note. On bidding me farewell, one of my friends said to me,” Keep in touch,okay?”. But this sentence just doesn’t apply to us now. We have barely been able to talk to each other,let alone meeting. But I understand that they all have moved on with their lives, they have got new friends and I have a whole other school life now. But it just hurts me that after all we went through, we haven’t been able to even see each others’ faces since around three or four years. Even thinking about them and all those days, hurts me. I feel like I am being stabbed in the very core of my heart. And no one can understand this pain because they all say the same thing,”Move on.” Little do they know that I can’t. They can’t get into my shoes because they will never understand.
One year passed. That was the year when we still used to talk on phones, meet each other or even just chat online. I got to know that three friends of mine were now in different section and the other two in another. And I was disappointed to know that because of this splitting, they had lost contact with each other. They all have different friend circles now,new friends, new lives. One day, one of my childhood besties called me up to tell me that she was also leaving that school. When I asked which school, she answered that she was going to a hostel in Rajasthan. I wasn’t able to say anything to that. Her going to another state, far far away from all of us, was strange and somehow mature. She broke the silence and said,”I know you are sad. We won’t be able to see each other the whole year except the summers,if that is possible. But we will try our best to do so whenever I have long-term vacations and I come back to Delhi.” I just mumbled a very quiet ‘yes,of course.’ But now, I am able to be in touch with her through e-mails. We chat very often now, so no regrets there.As for all my other friends, they are still there, with new groups and possibly even new personalities.
It is hard for me to think that it was all real,that it did really happen. But given the circumstances, it all feels like a dream. I would give anything to just go back, as if nothing had changed,where everything was as it is supposed to be.
I reminisce about those days every day. Trust me when I say that I think of them every single day of my life. They very often appear in my dreams too. But it is sad that we meet or talk to each other only in dreams now, not in reality. I just hope they haven’t forgotten me or those days ,and that those memories never fade.